envy

so I was scrolling along on my facebook profile, and I noticed this picture. it's a guy I barely know, and a girl I barely know. they are both young, around 20 or so. a good deal younger than me at any rate. he is widely accepted as a 'stud' and she is young and beautiful. in the picture she is mounted on his shoulders, radiant wearing almost nothing at all (a bikini). he is shirtless because they are at the beach. they were just engaged you see. and I think the camera captured a moment where the two of them are both happier than I've ever been in my life.
  and yeah, I have to admit I envy them. not only that, I pretty much resent their happiness. they are living their lives the same way I tried to, the only difference is they were rewarded with everything they wanted while I've been spat to the fringes of everything. mostly lonely, because I'm mostly alone. worse, I see no way out to remedy this situation. such is my lot in life.

I needed that like a kick in the head

"in her were all the beautiful things his heart wanted to say, but couldn't find the words."

 you know situations are dire when you simply can't win, not even in your dreams. when even your dreams betray you what is even the point anymore